今早在电梯里偶遇一对母女，母亲二十七八岁的模样，长相普通，穿着普通，左手挎着包，右手拿着手机看视频，从上电梯的那一刻她的眼睛就没有离开过手机屏幕。小女孩三四岁的样子，眼睛大大的，上幼儿园的年纪，背着小书包，天气有些凉却穿了小裙子。大概是因为年纪小好动，小女孩不停地扭动身子蹭电梯内壁，然而这位母亲始终没有关注一下女孩，眼睛从未离开手机屏幕。

This morning, I met a mother and her daughter in the elevator. The mother was 27 or 28 years old,ordinary face,ordinary dressed. She was carrying a bag in her left hand, and holding a mobile phone in her right hand to watch the video.The little girl looks like 3 or 4 years old, big eyes,with a schoolbag on her back, the age of kindergarten, cold weather but wearing a small skirt. Probably because of the young age, the little girl kept twisting and swaying the wall of the elevator. However, the mother never paid attention to the girl, her eyes never left the screen of the phone.

我可以听到这位年轻妈妈手机里传来的视频声音，她非常专注，不时地跟着视频一起笑。小女孩出于好奇，拉着母亲的胳膊，踮起脚，仰起头想要知道母亲正在看什么。年轻妈妈有些不耐烦，皱着眉头甩开她的手叫道：“你好好站着，在电梯里不要乱动！”，同时她的眼睛始终没有移开手机。我有些诧异，她讲的很自然，她自己在电梯大声的放着视频，却要求孩子好好站着不要影响她。到了地下车库，出电梯时她依然边走路边看手机,不管孩子有没有跟在身后。这位母亲给孩子造成的影响就是走路、坐电梯等出行时候不需要关注自己和家人的安全。

I could hear the voice of video coming from the young mother's mobile phone. She was very focused and laughed with video from time to time. The little girl, out of curiosity,stood on tiptoe, pulled her mother's arm, and looked up to see what her mother was looking at.The young mother was impatient,She frowned and shook her hand and shouted: "stand well, don't be naughty in the elevator!" However, her eyes never leave the phone screen.I was a little surprised that she spoke so naturally. She put a video in the elevator loudly, but asked her child to stand up and not affect her.When we got to the underground garage, she still looked at her phone as she steps out of the elevator, regardless of whether the child was behind or not. The impact this mother had on her children was to walk and to take the elevator,it's not necessary to pay attention to the safety of your own and your families.

以上的现象太普遍，大人们投入到玩手机刷段子的乐趣中，走路和坐电梯的时候，只盯着手机屏幕，全然不关注脚下的路。孩子们耳濡目染后自然就会认为这样做很正常，做出的举动会跟父母很相似，所以为什么现在沉迷于手机的人年龄愈来愈小，连不到一岁的小孩都知道抢夺父母的手机玩，这就是父母对孩子的影响。

All of this is so common that adults are obsessed with playing with their mobile phones. While walking and taking the elevator, they only look at the screen of their mobile phones and pay no attention to the road under their feet and the people around them. Children will naturally think it is normal to do this, and the behavior will be similar to their parents. Therefore, why people who are indulged in mobile phones are getting younger and younger. Even children under one year old know to grab their parents' mobile phones to play.

THIS IS THE IMPACT OF PARENTS ON CHILDREN!

前段时间看到一个新闻，一个母亲带着两个孩子去婴儿游泳馆游泳，把俩孩子放进水里，自己却转个背玩手机，小宝溺水的时候，大宝向母亲求助。母亲却忙于玩手机无动于衷，最终小宝在母亲眼皮子底下溺水身亡了。

Recently, I saw a news that a mother took her two children to a baby swimming pool for swimming. She put them into the water, and turned around to play with her mobile phone. When the younger baby was drowning, the older one asked his mother for help. His mother was busy playing with the mobile phone and was indifferent. In the end, the little baby drowned under the eyes of her mother!

对于小孩溺水的遭遇我们给予同情，但是这位母亲如果有责任心的正常看护孩子游泳，这种悲剧就不会发生。反之，如果小宝没有溺水，这位母亲依然会把注意力都放到手机上，孩子们会学习她的行为，沉迷手机而对自己应尽的职责漠不关心，很难在玩手机的同时专注的做事情，更不容易学会“责任”二字。

We sympathize with the child's drowning, but this tragedy would not have happened if the mother had been responsible to watch the child swim. On the contrary, if the baby was not drowning, this mother will still focus on her mobile phone, children will learn her behavior, indulge in the mobile phone and pay no attention to their responsibilities, it is difficult to focus on doing things while playing with the phone, and it is not easy to learn the word "responsibility".

现在越来越多的父母为教育孩子发愁，经常听朋友说孩子难管，总爱玩手机，总爱看电视等等。可悲的是,他们自己从未给孩子树立一个良好的榜样！说不允许玩手机，但是自己却沉浸在刷段子的乐趣里，说少看电视，自己却没有时间概念的追剧，完全没有自律。要求孩子做的自己却不遵守，很有“只许州官放火不许百姓点灯”的意味。孩子不是傻瓜，没那么好骗，只是动嘴说教就想让孩子变成自己想要的模样，这样未免太天真。如果你是一个进门就窝在沙发上刷抖音看快手的人，你的孩子一回家就正襟危坐，专注于书本的几率几乎为零，要求孩子的时候，先学会以身作则。

Now more and more parents are worried about children of education, I often hear my friends say that children are difficult to manage, always like to play with mobile phones,watch TV and so on.HOWEVER,THEY NEVER SET A GOOD EXAMPLE TO THEIR CHILDREN!They don't allow children to play with mobile phones, but indulge themselves in the fun of using them. Required children to watch less TV, but they do not have the concept of time to watch the show, with no self-discipline. Ask children to do what themself can not do, very much "One may steal a horse while another may not look over the hedge." meaning. 孩子不是傻瓜，没那么好骗，只动嘴说教就想让孩子变成自己想要的模样，这样未免太天真。如果你是一个进门就窝在沙发上刷抖音看快手的人，你的孩子一回家就专注于书本,专注于学习的几率几乎为零。要求孩子的时候，先学会以身作则。Children are not fools, they are not so gullible. It would be naive to expect children to become what they want just by preaching.If you're a person who always sits on the couch ,plays with your phone and watches TV every time when you back home,It's almost impossible for your child to focus on studying or reading,as you've given them a bad demonstration!

WHEN YOU REQUIRE YOUR CHILDREN,LEARN TO LEAD BY EXAMPLE FIRST!

大部分父母以平时上班辛苦为借口，回到家就玩手机、看电视，却会要求孩子好好读书，告诉孩子必须好好学习的理由就是：“你看我供你读书多不容易，好好学习，不然将来要像我一样辛苦工作。”这个理由并不能说服孩子，孩子会认为父母做不到的事情，却强加给孩子。正确的做法应该是父母也不要停止学习，应该和孩子共同进步，跟孩子交流听取孩子心里真实的想法，而不是一味的口头说教，先以身作则的做好自己的事情，起到表率的作用。

Most parents, with the usual tiredness at work as an excuse, come home to play on their phones, watching TV, but will ask their children to keep study.The reason they tell their children to have to study hard is: "you see how hard it is for me to send you to school, study hard, or you will have to work as hard as me in the future!"The reason cannot convince the children!Children will think their parents did not do what they asked them to do!The right thing to do is that parents should also be active in learning and constantly improving themselves with their children.Listen to your child's real thoughts and give him a good example!

我在大理居住的时候认识了一对美国夫妇，他们这一方面做的很好，夫妇俩有4个小孩，两个男孩，两个女孩。老大喜欢踢足球，所以父亲会陪伴他踢足球，老二在家里练习绘画，老三喜欢弹吉他，老四只有5岁喜欢在家里院子里种植。晚饭后全家会围坐在一起读书，周末的时候全家出动爬山。孩子耳濡目染父母的行为，自然就变成了爱学习、热爱户外、兴趣广泛的人。

I met an American couple while living in Dali. They did a good job in this respect.The couple have four children, two boys and two girls.The father enjoys playing football with his eldest son and playing guitar with the third son.The mother taught her second daughter to paint, and worked with her 5-year-old daughter on gardening.After dinner, the whole family would sit together and read books. On weekends, the whole family would go hiking.Children, influenced by their parents' behavior, will naturally become people who love learning, love outdoors, and have a wide range of interests.

不要再一味的说教，而自己却不自律，想要你的孩子乐观、认真、积极、有责任心、自律，自己就要先改变。先学会以身作则，做孩子的榜样。也许我今天谈及的问题，不够深刻，仅仅是想要把看到想到的分享出来。抛砖引玉,欢迎探讨。

Stop preaching without discipline！Want your child to be optimistic, serious, positive, responsible and disciplined，change yourself first!Set a good example for your children!Maybe what I'm talking about isn't deep enough,but I still want to share what I saw and thought to throw out a brick to attract a jade .

writen by WangXiaoyu

2018-9-8

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