Trouble handling emotions
Just as communication is important, clearly identifying and coming to terms with one's emotions is critical for the success and vitality of your relationship. "When one or both members of a couple has difficulty identifying and talking about their emotions constructively, it leads to a basic failure to connect on a meaningful level," Dr. Brenner says. As with communication issues, it can lead to basic misunderstanding and get in the way of planning as well as intimacy. In addition, Dr.Brenner adds that it can lead to one or both people feeling invalidated and unrecognized by the other person, and can sometimes become a situation where one person has to get good at "picking up" on what the other person is feeling and wants.
While this can work for some couples, it doesn't work for all. "It can become problematic because the person who isn't adept at expressing his or her feelings is enabled to keep things to themselves," he says. This is when speaking with a couples counselor can be beneficial. Doing so earlier than later is wise, as Dr. Brenner points out that, as more time passes, more negativity and issues continue to build up, making them harder to sort out.