This post will cover kill two breasts birds with one stone...
Comedy and politics are such natural bedfellows. Except to the left.
The left have no bedfellows.
(Chains, money, or a having psychological hostage- do not a bedfellow, make.)
Picture this...
You're sixteen years old. You're at a party.
And you're a little bit drunk.
For some bizarre reason a girl seems to have taken an interest in you - even though you can't mumble one single coherent sentence to her...but she still hasn't run away!
You find yourself in a room with her, alone..how the hell did that happen?, you don't quite know...but it did.
Your 3 extra wanks that day due to the party that night, seems to have made no difference to your erection being alive and well...
You entire senses are filled with female.....
The rest of the world disappears as you start to kiss her (and she still hasn't run away, to your amazement..).
As the passion rises, you dare to reach around and try and undo her bra...
With fingers as steady as a guy who is 48 hours into an alcohol detox, you find that the girl has no only not run away, but is also waiting patiently as you fumble around, as you attempt to release your version of heaven...
Her goddamn bra hooks. You know it's not rocket sience, you've watched them being undone untold times - at least 4 hours a day. Your porn collection shows you just how easy it is.
It's easy. It's simple....
... It should be...
The girl sighs and you notice cobwebs are starting to grow, in the corners of the room...
The clip! the fucking clip!.... it just can't be this difficult. Shit shit shit shit!
The girls gets covered in spiders silk, and her perfect skin turns to wizened old leather, waiting patiently for you to undo the clasps that will give you access to all the things you've been obsessing over, constantly, for the last 4 years...
So near, but so,so far..
..if only those hooks would work, as they fucking should work !...You know it's not your fault. It just can't be....
The seasons change and you eventually stop trying... the arthritis sets in, and it seizes up your joints...and then you give up.
You realize that you're just not man enough yet to accomplish such a gargantuan task.
It's beyond you, and the little boy returns, resignation is in the air....and then she sighs some more..
She shuffles out on her zimmer frame, leaving you alone in the bedroom with only your sense of defeat and being a total failure, to keep you company.
Even your 24 hour erection has said goodbye for a while.
And THIS my friends is why the left can't meme....
The Gordian knot.
Sometime it's a bra strap, and sometime it's life ...
Answers to impossible questions such as 'do I look fat in this?' are child's play - in comparison to _ the Gordian knot_ of the bra strap.
Now what the hell does dredging up pubescent nightmare party scenarios have to do with commies and memes you might be asking...
Everything!!!
The left find the simplest things inexorably intertwined.
Frustratingly so.
So much so, that their life is spent focused on the complexities , rather than seeing the simplicity..... ( ...two fucking hooks!!!! , how is this even possible?).
Imagine if life was that room.
Imagine if life's problems was that bra strap.
Imagine if you could never manage to undo it.
Imagine yourself, and the sexiest girl - ever - in the history of mankind, waiting patiently for you to do your job , but to no avail.
Now imagine your 3 funniest comedians of all time, coming into that room....
Just how funny would you find them right now - as you fervently tried to free 'the girl of your dreams' perfect breasts?
Would you be curling up in laughter at their witty one liners, or would you be shouting at them to 'just fuck off!' at the the top of your voice...as the spiders weave their webs in the corners of the room...
There would no room for laughter, time is going on, and patience is wearing thin... and you're still no nearer to unlocking those mysteries.
( only two friggin' hooks, goddamn it!)
Life just _can't be that simple _and that complicated , both at the same time.
But it is for that teenager, in that room...
So how the hell can you expect humor out of person who see's life as oh so fucking complicated,!
The leftist ideology is fraught with contradictions, moral , philosophical, and practical.
Do you want to know something else...?
I think the (intelligent) left know this also , deep down.
But still they try to continue unpicking a knot with no end...It's an ego thing maybe. Or too many years of invested time down one rabbit hole. And now too scared to see the alternatives as a good choice...I dunno.
How the hell can you crack a joke, or see humor - with such internal mental confusion going on?
How can your mind be free to see the laughs when it's trying to reconcile the irreconcilable...
Just because there is an appearance of the fully developed adult stood in front of you, it doesn't mean there isn't still an emotionally confused, intellectually frustrated adolescent hiding behind the facade - still frantically trying to work out the simplicity of those clasps...
No wonder the left can't meme..
No wonder they are so frustrated.
No wonder they are so passive aggressive (yanking on those clasps, seldom gets the results intended).
The answer is easy of course - to see the simplicity of the hooks. Life itself .
....and then you can enjoy the untold pleasures of what undoing them has to offer.
Laughter being one of them.
And breasts being another.
And a word of warning for those still fumbling to unclasp the bra if you have an impatient girl in your life..
...there will always be the another guy at the party.
One that has no problem in undoing hooks...
Clean your head....
I nominate @samstonehill ....because he's in denial about baldness... and @openparadigm because he's an infowarrior with a sense of humor..