Sorry about that the other day, I was tired. Recounting events in my life is taking a toll from me, so please bear with me. Thank you for listening though, I knew you would understand. Do you want some wine? Okay then, let's continue.
I have seen people die before but I have never gotten used to the sight. Besides I was too high to think rationally at first but then I had stopped screaming. I bent to study the motionless body before me. My own body was cold, goose bumps crawled on my skin, dancing around stiff hair follicles like dancers around trees, my hands shook and fear sat within me like a stone.
I tiptoed around the body and picked up the purse that sat innocently on the floor. Sometimes one has to wonder at the content of a woman’s purse; the stories those lips would tell if they could.
Inside, I found the pellets of crack. I knew what it was because some of the girls used it to stay awake while they jumped from one customer to the next in drugged abandon. I have seen it with clients seeking for escape, for salvation, for peace, for home.
Sometimes the world is a dark place and we have to light our own paths the best way we can. Don't judge us.
I looked at the banker lady as she laid spread-eagled like one who had just been rammed through by a trio of young boys trying to prove a point. Though we had hooked up several times, I had never asked for her name and she had never been intimate enough to tell me. One would have thought she would be above pain but if you know pain, you will come to understand that it is the sibling we all don't talk about.
I shook my head and searched the purse for a phone. I found her cell phone inside but I could not do anything with it, it was passworded. Luckily a number was on the screen, obviously a missed call.
It is my business to keep secrets and maintain the dignity of my clientele. It is their business to pretend that I do not exist when they don’t need me.
I found my phone and I dialed the number. The truecaller app showed the caller ID to be one Madam Doreen. As the phone rang, a knock came on the door. I had forgotten about the people we had left downstairs at the party. I ended the call and quickly got dressed. I took deep breaths, then I opened the door.
Two men whom I had never met before stood before me. Both were clean shaven, Not a single hair stood on their shiny heads which reflected the light from the hallway. While one was short and wide, the other stood tall and slim. The slim one smiled at me with his lips even as the short one pushed me into the room and then rushed passed me, his eyes wandering all over the room. The tall one simply walked to a chair and sat down.
“Please ignore Grub, he is very dedicated to his job. Have a seat.” He said.
I took a seat as far away from him as I could. He smiled and nodded, then he dipped his hand into his suit pocket and brought out a pack of benson and hedges. He stretched the pack towards me but I declined. He shook it again and I saw the flash of the gun nestled in a shoulder holster on his right side. I took the offered cigarette and bent towards him as he flicked his gas lighter on. As the cigarette cut fire, I watched him watch me. My hands were shaking as I tried to place the cigarette on my lips.
“She is out, Brog but I can get her up.” The short man’s voice came from inside the bathroom.
I sucked the cigarette and let the smoke fill me up, my eyes fixed on the dead eyes of the tall man. His smiles never reached his eyes. They seem to hesitate at his chin and fall back. I knew when to be scared and when to start praying. The tall man lit a stick of cigarette and sat back smoking, his eyes closed as if he was at home with his family and we were having an after dinner chitchat, while the kids were in bed. I shook my head and turned around. My phone was on the bed, too far for me to get to. I had nothing to save me except my brain and at that moment my brain was a mess.
“I know this may seem really bad but I guarantee you that you have nothing to worry about. I won’t tell a soul of what I saw today. I don't even know what I had seen.” I tried to explain to Brog, my lips shaking, my eyes darting to the bulge of the gun visible on his suit.
You know how when you notice something for the first time, you can't help noticing it again and again? Well the gun could not leave my eyes alone.
“Do you know who we are?” Brog, I guess that was an alias, asked.
I shook my head. He nodded and turned as Grub came into the room carrying the banker lady. He placed her gently on the bed and turned to look at me. I turned quickly to gaze at the floor. Brog flicked his cigarette and I watched the ashes flitter in the air then fall to the floor. My cigarette was burning but my hands shook to bad for me to hold the thing on my lips.
“We have been employed to make sure that the lady over there stays alive. It is our job to watch over her as well as make sure that she does not embarrass anyone.” He dragged the cigarette smoke in and let it out.
I heard a click but I could not turn my eyes from the man before me. I could not act like I just heard a gun's safety being removed. I could not act like I knew that at any moment my brain would be decorating the floor behind me. I swallowed the bile that rushed to my throat and thrust the cigarette forcefully into my lips. I stood up. The slim one watched me and I watched him.
This was my territory and I have been playing this game for a very long time, too long in fact. I started taking off all article of clothing I had on me. I was putting all my cards on the table and my cards were quite slim but what the hell! I will still get fucked either ways. It is either I offer it and retain some self respect before I die, or I get raped and then shot or even worse I get raped after I have been shot. There are strange creatures in the guise of men in this world of ours.
Brog turned to Grub and raised an eyebrow. Grub shrugged and dropped his gun. His hand was heavy as he grabbed me and dragged me into another part of the suite. He pushed me against the wall, and grabbed my breasts roughly. I felt his hot fetid breath on my neck and held back the bile that sat at the back of my throat. I was so focused on trying not to vomit that I did not hear his zip go down, or the rustle of his boxer short as he brought his dick out. The next thing I heard was another scream. Yes it was me screaming again as a sharp pain ran through my rectum to my brain. The beast had his penis in my ass.
I struggled away from him but he held me close and the man was strong. I begged him. I swear I begged him with all the names of all the gods that I knew and even others that I didn’t know I knew but the goat kept thrusting into me. As he came inside me, my knees gave out on me and I fell to the floor. He grunted above me, leering like a hyena. His sour sweat fell on me as blood and semen leaked out of me. I passed out.
I know you hear stories like this all the time and the world is indeed a weird place where evil is so common place that we no longer get shocked by such things. I will not bore you with how I laid there and bled while the two men got the banker lady back on her feet and left. I will only tell you that the Brog came to meet me, lying on the floor. He squatted over me and shook his head
“Never offer to pay when you have not heard the price, my dear girl.” He had said.
I laid in the darkness and wept for myself, for this broken shell that I call home, for my son in his innocence, for my mother in her pain, for this broken world were beasts were better men than men, then I slept.
I woke up to hands lifting me from the floor. I opened my eyes to watch the fearful eyes of the waiter that had served me water. He carried me to the bathroom and gently laid me in the tub. I watched him as he filled the bath and we both watched the blood soak the water. He opened a bottle of Jack Daniels and gave it to me. I opened my mouth and let the fiery spirit fill my throat. He watched me and I watched me from the dark place were I hid, cringing in pain and shame. We had no words; I was dumb with pain, he had been paid to stay dumb.
He cleaned me as best as he could while I drank myself to stupor then he carried me back to the room and helped me get dressed. He helped me down the stairs and stopped a taxi for me. As I entered the taxi, he handed a slip of paper to me. I took it and sat back carefully as the pain slowly sipped into my bones. The waiter paid the taxi and the driver asked me for directions. I managed to whisper the directions to the motel then I closed my eyes and went to sleep.
The taxi driver woke me up on arriving at the motel, and I carefully stepped out, holding the bottle of Jack Daniel and the slip of paper. The asphalt tilted before me as I tried to walk on weak legs. The taxi driver called me back and handed me my purse containing my phone. I took it and mumbled my thanks.
I walked passed the late night silence of the motel. From the corner of my eyes I could see one or two ghosts sitting in the cold, smoke curling from their lips, liquor before them as well as memories of better days when they still lived as someone's beloved daughter. One of them called out to me, I raised my hand and walked on.
I entered my room and shut the door. I dropped the bottle on the table and the paper stained with liquor fell from my hand. I bent, staggered and picked it up. It was a check for 500k. That is how much a rape is worth these days. I fell on my bed and wept.
Someone is at the door, we will continue some other time. You would think that I do not cry as I tell you this tale. You would think that I do not hurt but sometimes, life has to come first over whatever emotional trauma you are facing. You have to eat, work, sleep, and talk with people. You have to live and now you have to also share your story with strangers. Well, my eyes are heavy with the pain but I am used to hiding stuff, so I dab some powder here, some powder there and I am good as new. You should go, we will talk later. There is more to tell.