"It seems like just a lack of self discipline"
"It doesn't exist"
"I don't think it could be that since you did well in school"
"It's pathologising kids being kids"
"What is wrong with me?"
"Why can't I handle these things like all these other people seem to be able to?"
Hi guys,
The first four of these are ignorant things people have said about a legitimate health issue.
The other two are things one may ask themselves if they have it but are undiagnosed.
The title of this post is also a misconception.
Those who have been reading my posts in the past may have seen posts that suggested I had issues with some areas of my life, such as time management. I posted posts discussing the solutions I had attempted in order to overcome these believing they may help others.
One was a discussion about systems which you can read here if you like: @birchmark/a-week-of-using-a-system
The other main one was my review of the app EpicWin, which is something I am still using now and an essential part of my life. The way I use it and the types of tasks I put into it has evolved over time but it is still an important tool for me. You can read the review I did 5 months ago here if you like: @birchmark/level-up-those-stats-and-your-productivity-epicwin-app-review
I will probably talk about this app again in the future as it is of great help to me.
I have now found out the reason for various issues I have been facing, including my issues with time management and getting stuff done. I have suspected it for quite a while, since before I wrote the articles linked above, but I got my answer Wednesday last week.
I have ADHD
I found out now at 27, that I have ADHD. It was a long road to getting this answer.
The first thing I did that related to this was actually due to Jacksepticeye.
In a video he completed an online test for if he had ADHD. My partner and I did it after watching that video purely out of curiosity. I scored high on the test but didn't think much of it at the time.
Later on, I got into an argument with my partner. I couldn't understand why I acted the way I did throughout that argument. I googled what I did. I can't even remember exactly what it was now. I wasn't expecting anything to come up and explain why I did what I did / do what I do - it was just a blind stab in the dark out of frustration. But what came up was an article about a guy with ADHD. Within the article it described an argument him and his partner had about ice-cream. This wasn't the whole article but made up part of it. The way he responded and the way he (mis)understood what his partner said in that argument sounded like me. Then I remembered the quiz that I did after Jacksepticeye did. I kept looking on other websites. It was like reading a story of my own life. It was so weird at the time I was reading about ADHD for the first time. Everything fitted. It sounded very much like me.
And so started the process of finding out if I had ADHD. This was not a quick or easy process. This took months and involved multiple appointments with GP's and psychiatrists and psychologists and this wasn't an easy thing to work out given I was also on a low budget. I had to do a reasonable amount of research myself too as my GP didn't tell me about every option available either. I saw multiple people and occasionally hit roadblocks or people who didn't understand, but eventually I got to the point of getting a diagnosis. It was at the start of this month, which was the second appointment with the person who actually finally diagnosed me, so at about the start of last month we had the ball finally rolling with some actual momentum. I finally had an answer. I have ADHD. It was great to finally get an answer. I also was prescribed medication for ADHD and the difference it makes even at a low dose is so helpful.
I am only on a low dose currently and we are still working out my ideal dose at this point, but even at this dose medication makes me calmer and more focused. It appears to have helped with emotional impulsivity which is a symptom of ADHD, but it hasn't gone the other way and made me an emotionless robot either. I just feel more in control and less impulsive with my emotions when on meds. It's easier to focus on study, driving, work and even just stuff like the plots of TV shows in the time I'm medicated. I miss less of what people are saying too which is good as I don't deliberately not listen or not take it in. I go from being completely overwhelmed by driving and by being unsure which thing to concentrate on while driving off meds (to the point I have a learners still) to feeling confident and calm when driving (but still inexperienced currently - but I intend to change that) and finding it easier to work out what I should be concentrating on at what time on meds. The difference with driving is night and day. Some people don't choose medication as a treatment option but it has been a good experience for me so far and definitely seems worth it so far.
And no, my medication unfortunately isn't all glittery like the picture - that's just the prettiest picture I could find for medication (wait maybe that's fortunately - I think glitter wouldn't be good for your insides).
But medication alone isn't the full treatment, and I didn't just sit and wait for the diagnosis to be given before I did anything about it. It's best to use treatments in conjunction with other treatments - a more "whole" approach than just using one thing alone to manage the disorder. I had been struggling with tertiary study and other aspects of life. I started researching ADHD and how to study with ADHD amongst other ADHD topics. I started to learn how to work with my brain instead of against it.
One of the best resources I found for ADHD that helped me a lot was the YouTube channel, HowToADHD: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC-nPM1_kSZf91ZGkcgy_95Q
One of the first things I discovered (this was prior to discovering the YT channel above) was about using systems. The post I linked earlier was about the system I was using then. I don't quite use that system anymore but I have strategies and tools that work better for me and some aspects of that system carry over into the tools and strategies I use now.
I have also started using apps to help me with my study and with life in general. What I do now with the apps is basically what the system evolved into as I gained more information. One of those was EpicWin which I mentioned earlier and linked to an old review I did on it. This app has helped me so much. Another one is Forest and another one is Headspace.
I also have started more recently again then when I started using the apps, recording down the time I spend on study on each course etc and rewarding myself for achieving things. This little bit of extra strategy has helped even more.
Other things I have done for treatment has included exercising as exercising is great for ADHD. Exercising is great for many other things too, but the main reason I exercise is for the brain benefits. I have also adjusted my diet to include more protein as protein is good for ADHD. I also use fidgets to help with my concentration and focus.
Without going into too much depth, the strategies above are the main strategies I have implemented and they've helped me stay on top of study this semester (even before medication) so they have been a great help. Some of them I started last study semester but it was partway through the semester so the damage of getting behind etc was already done, but this semester how much they benefit me has really become obvious. Learning to work with my brain has been one of the best things I ever did. Is it perfect? No. Will my strategies change again over time? Most certainly, improvement is always good. Will it mean I never mess up? No. But it is so much better than before I started working with my brain rather than against it.
Over this time life also just got more complicated in general. One of the units I am studying as part of my tertiary study relied heavily on us managing a project on our own and managing our time and just generally stuff I was struggling with. However, I managed to follow strategies I had learned and that I had seen online, including on the HowToADHD channel and I so far am managing to succeed at that unit (this unit does go for a whole year though, ending midway through next year so I've got a way to go yet).
I also got a new job after spending quite a while as only a student and this job is great and rewarding, but also demands a bit in areas I struggle with such as planning, following up on things, not making mistakes in paperwork etc and working memory and is meaning I'm now juggling work and study and stuff for my home business. I couldn't be happier about the job but it does play on both my strengths and weaknesses. The strategies and apps I use help with this.
Even with these extra challenges I am doing better than before and discovering I have ADHD has lead to so much self improvement since I now knew how to since most suggested ways to do so didn't work for me (but working with my brain does) and to eventual medical treatment and I am so glad that I know now .
Thank you for reading this guys, and congratulations if you made it this far since this is quite long. This has been a big thing for me and I'm glad to finally know. I hope you enjoyed reading it.
LINKS
Birchmark Website / Portfolio: http://birchmark.com.au/
Dlive: https://dlive.tv/birchmark
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/BirchmarkAu
Subreddit: https://www.reddit.com/r/Birchmark/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/Birchmark_
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/birchmark/
Redbubble: https://www.redbubble.com/people/birchmark?asc=u
Threadless: https://birchmark.threadless.com/
Dailymotion: http://www.dailymotion.com/Birchmark
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