Ode to That One Guy I Met at a Party and Never Saw Again

I remember our chance encounter.

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It was at a random house in the suburbs of Toronto. I decided to head to Canada for spring break on a whim, invited by a friend I knew through a messageboard. My relationship with that board is a long and slightly insane story, so I'll save the details for a future post.

At the time, I was coming out of a long period of depression, brought on by a rocky first semester at college and an unrequited love with a highly confused woman. I decided to get away and venture into the great white north and experience something completely new.

My friend knew a lot of interesting people, as I had met her previously for a Radiohead concert and had been introduced to a varied selection of unique and outside-the-box thinkers. When she told me she knew of a house party about 20 minutes outside of town, I had no hesitation in tagging along.

That night still ranks as one of my most influential experiences in my lifetime

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The party was a blast. Perhaps a bit too much of a blast, as I shot far past my depressive state and into my first and only taste of hypomania. I was elated to be around individuals with such unique, diverse, and profound takes on life.

The first time you meet people who can relate and understand to deep existential questions and metaphysical meanderings is a transformative experience. It's akin to meeting members of a lost tribe you didn't know you were apart of, something that completely shifts your feeling of isolation and alienation.

One of these people was a person who I felt instantly connected to. Our conversations flowed seamlessly, as though we were long lost friends from a past life and had picked up exactly where we left off.

No topic was off limits. Aided by an extra dose of courage and clarity, my normally shy persona broke past my self-imposed limits and waded into territory that was completely foreign. I was baring my soul without reservation or doubt, and it felt liberating.

He was a programmer and was working on a gaming project, the specifics of which now slip my mind more than a decade later. He was committed to his community and taking care of those close to him. Unfortunately, I never got to see how committed he was to these ideals.

I never saw him again

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After that evening, I was sure I would see this person again. I earnestly believed this person was going to be someone who would become an important part of my life, that this chance encounter would be the start of a fruitful relationship.

Due to distance, circumstances, and a degree of neglect on my part, our relationship began and ended that evening. My preconceived notions of how things would develop were offbase.

He is an example of a much larger trend. Individuals you meet at random moments throughout your life that make a deep impact, and though the time you spend with them is brief, their effect still resonates long after the moment has passed.

Here's to the people who make a difference in the brief time we spend with them


I'm referring to the tertiary cast of characters we meet in life. The ones meaningful enough to leave an imprint, but for whatever reason don't make the final cut. Priorities and circumstances prevent a more lasting connection and now they've faded into a background with each passing year.

I think about these individuals from time to time and wonder what they're up to. Is that guy I met in Toronto doing well? Did his gaming project succeed? Did he get married, divorced, have children? Is he even still alive?

Sure, I could probably find this information out through social media. And perhaps this post will be the catalyst that drives me to finally reach out and see how he's doing.

Or perhaps I'll leave the question unanswered, like the ending of a movie that doesn't fully answer all of the questions. Perhaps that person was only ever meant to be defined by that evening and that 7-hour conversation.

Either way, I'm happy we met. You're not just that guy I met at a party. You're now also a story about yourself. And despite my limited interaction with you, I feel as though you would appreciate the metaphysical aspect of that.


All uncredited pictures from pixabay.com or my personal account

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